For the love that doesn't need a label.
Lavinder is where people build lasting partnerships on their own terms: a forever companion, a co-parent, a marriage that fits your life. You define what love looks like.
Almost there! Check your inbox and click the link to confirm.
We only ask for your email for now.
Only meaningful conversations last.
No endless swiping, no chats that drag on for weeks. We match on the life you want and keep your time for the people who matter.
Say what you’re looking for
Kids, living arrangements, finances, family, timeline. Tell us once, deal-breakers first.
Meet people who want the same life
A short daily selection matched on your expectations, and at most five active conversations.
Actually talk
A conversation lasts 48 hours. At 20 messages exchanged on both sides, it becomes permanent. Outside contact details are shared only if you both agree.
The app, screen by screen.
A profile built on your expectations, a short selection, a conversation that moves forward. Interface preview, fictional content.
My expectations
Mark what is non-negotiable.
Yes, 1 or 2Deal-breaker
Shared homeDeal-breaker
Separate accountsFlexible
Introduced to familyFlexible
12 to 18 monthsFlexible
Today’s picks
3 compatible profiles today.
Conversation
Love takes the shape you give it.
A forever companion. A co-parent. A marriage built on friendship. What matters is that you want the same thing, and say so before you commit.
Built to expose nothing.
Lavinder is under construction. Here is what we commit to from day one.
Verified members, private details
Every account is verified with an email and a phone number, so there is a real person behind every profile. Your contact details are never shown to other members, and no legal name is required.
End-to-end encrypted messages
We cannot read your conversations.
An app that keeps a low profile
Neutral name and icon, passcode lock, notifications without content.
What expires disappears
A conversation that ends is erased from the server and from the device.
Private does not mean anonymous: accounts are verified, and a screenshot is still possible. We explain the limits rather than hide them.
Be there when we open.
Spots open in waves, city by city, so every profile finds enough people nearby.